Mandy Mullet

Does my bum look big in this? It’s a household joke but I wasn’t laughing when my sister put on one of her “I’m you” faces and mimicked me looking at myself in the mirror the other day. Cheeky cow!

Unfortunately, she wasn’t all that far off the mark with her painfully caustic remark as I appear to have gained a few pounds since I last took any real notice. Which was before Christmas!

Blast! Now I’ll have to cut back on a few things and get out a bit more and do some of that exercise thing that people talk about. Oh well, it could be worse and I could be very overweight, which I’m not. In fact, I’m not really much overweight at all, just a few measly pounds…

So who has got some timely and, most importantly, easy to follow and even easier to action weight loss tips for someone who isn’t much more than she should be when balancing precariously on the scales…? I know, I know: Cut out that afternoon slice of what Mr Kipling does exceedingly well and replace it with a stick of celery then go for a 10 mile jog and you’ll be back in shape in a jiffy! If only it were that simple. Actually, I found this site in my travels and I liked the slant on the whole slimming thing in this particular post here: rapid weight loss tips. When you read it, you’ll understand why I liked it!

I like my slice of Cherry Bakewell with a nice cup of tea in the afternoon and I certainly do not like to run through the streets of this polluted city and breathe in great lung-fulls of the copious plumes of carbon monoxide spewed from car, van and truck exhausts. I don’t know what’s worse, a few pounds of excess chunkiness (which actually a lot of blokes prefer as long as they’re in the right places) or seared lungs and cancer from all that sweet benzine in the air.

So it would appear that I’ve talked (or more accurately written) myself into a decision based entirely on the flawless logic that if I try to lose weight I will get cancer. Which means I can continue to enjoy my tea and cake, I don’t have to go within three feet of a track suit and I can remind myself that all the blokes are staring at my bum because they like it the size that it is!

Now that’s logic! See you again…

Mandy Mullet